Pictured: Ceramist Francisco Figueiredo opens a casting mould of a phallus in his workshop in Chao de Parada, central Portugal June 26, 2008. Husband and wife Francisco and Cassilda Figueiredo are among the last exponents of a traditional Portuguese handicraft -- making ornamental ceramic penises. For more than three decades, the couple have carefully shaped thousands of ceramic male organs, moulding them into upright shapes and painting them in life-like colours for export to Germany, France and North America.
"Mr. Figueriedo, what, exactly, do you do for a living?"
"I make-a the deeks."
"The deeks?"
"Thats-a right, here we make-a the beeg deeks."
"And Mrs. Figueriedo? Do you help your husband?"
"Thats-a right. I help-a Frankie make-a all the beeg deeks."
"Is the competition particularly stiff?"
"Steef? HaHa You make-a joke! Steef competition! No. No steef. Nobody else make-a the beeg ceramic deeks. Just-a Frankie and-a Cassie here."
"Thank you."
"Your-a welcome. By the way, we are-a Portuguese. Why-a you have us talk-a like Italiano?"
"Now don't get cocky, you little peckerhead."
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Historical trivia: Lord Likely was reported to have purchased three of the ceramic willies from Frankie's great-grandfather, for display at his london estate.
I was going to leave a comment about this post-but decided not to.
ReplyDeleteCoward, Descartes. I had suspected you were a coward. Afraid to offend the delicate sensibilities of my timid pub customers with vile words. I see. :)
ReplyDeleteHmm, should I rise to challenge of such petty banter? Of Course!
ReplyDeleteYou know I think that fellow has broken some sort of copyright infringement-sadly it is not my copyright.
I'll be appearing nightly!
I have a perfect place on my shelf for one of those!
ReplyDeletewhere do you find these photos...?
ReplyDeleteoh nevermind, don't answer that.
Give him a silver platter, why don't cha Claire? I'm surprised he has kept quiet so far.....
ReplyDeleteLook for your High Five from me HERE.
ReplyDelete