Saturday, July 5, 2008

Whopper Willies

Here's something you may not have thought there would be much of a call for: Gigantic ceramic willies.

Pictured: Ceramist Francisco Figueiredo opens a casting mould of a phallus in his workshop in Chao de Parada, central Portugal June 26, 2008. Husband and wife Francisco and Cassilda Figueiredo are among the last exponents of a traditional Portuguese handicraft -- making ornamental ceramic penises. For more than three decades, the couple have carefully shaped thousands of ceramic male organs, moulding them into upright shapes and painting them in life-like colours for export to Germany, France and North America.

"Mr. Figueriedo, what, exactly, do you do for a living?"

"I make-a the deeks."

"The deeks?"

"Thats-a right, here we make-a the beeg deeks."

"And Mrs. Figueriedo? Do you help your husband?"

"Thats-a right. I help-a Frankie make-a all the beeg deeks."

"Is the competition particularly stiff?"

"Steef? HaHa You make-a joke! Steef competition! No. No steef. Nobody else make-a the beeg ceramic deeks. Just-a Frankie and-a Cassie here."

"Thank you."

"Your-a welcome. By the way, we are-a Portuguese. Why-a you have us talk-a like Italiano?"

"Now don't get cocky, you little peckerhead."


Historical trivia: Lord Likely was reported to have purchased three of the ceramic willies from Frankie's great-grandfather, for display at his london estate.


  1. I was going to leave a comment about this post-but decided not to.

  2. Coward, Descartes. I had suspected you were a coward. Afraid to offend the delicate sensibilities of my timid pub customers with vile words. I see. :)

  3. Hmm, should I rise to challenge of such petty banter? Of Course!

    You know I think that fellow has broken some sort of copyright infringement-sadly it is not my copyright.

    I'll be appearing nightly!

  4. I have a perfect place on my shelf for one of those!

  5. where do you find these photos...?

    oh nevermind, don't answer that.

  6. Give him a silver platter, why don't cha Claire? I'm surprised he has kept quiet so far.....

  7. Look for your High Five from me HERE.


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