Friday, December 10, 2010

Faster than a speeding bullet

No matter how fast light travels, darkness got there first and was waiting for it.
—Terry Pratchett

Fast? I'm so fast I can turn out the light and jump into bed before the room gets dark.
—Muhammad Ali

I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.
—Steven Wright

I watched the Indy 500, and I was thinking that if they left earlier they wouldn't have to go so fast.
—Steven Wright

I play the harmonica. The only way I can play is if I get my car going really fast, and stick it out the window.
—Steven Wright

To fly as fast as thought, you must begin by knowing that you have already arrived.
—Richard Bach (Jonathan Livingston Seagull)

God made me fast, and when I run I feel his pleasure.
—Eric Liddell

The trouble with talking too fast is you might say something you haven't thought of yet.
—Ann Landers

Moving fast is not the same as going somewhere.
—Robert Anthony


  1. I need to be fast this weekend. You've started my Saturday with a smile. :)

  2. Moving fast is not the same as going somewhere.

    Very good.

  3. I'm grown-up enough to know that taking the slow route's often more fun.

    I wish, though, that as a child I'd been more like Mohammed Ali, or Cassius Clay, as we knew him. Which was a coool name. (Mohammed Ali? ha. there are millions of Mohammeds, few Cassii.)
    You see, the monsters under the bed could grab you with a scaly claw, if you got too close in the dark. And the light switch was by the door. The fact that i am here to write this, and not chewed into tiny pieces long ago, is proof I was capable of prodigious leaps as a small child.
    My dad would yell up the stairs in an angry roar "What are you doing up there? Just get to bed and go to sleep, stop crashing around!". Obviously, when he was seven, he had a dog that could keep the monsters penned up, and unable to grab. But I didn't. It was so unfair. "No, you can't have a dog, who'd feed it and look after it? Not you, because you don't put your toys away". I never understood why he linked my untidiness with dog-food.

    Some times I write so fast i say things I haven't even told myself.
    And I can't hold a harmonica out of my car window, because i haven't fixed the window motor yet. It's low priority. Who needs a window to open when summer's so far away?

  4. @A. - Why do you need to be fast this weekend? Well, I'm glad I started your Saturday with a smile. If you're going to France again, you'll need a sense of humor.

    @Adullamite - I didn't get that one. Was it deep? I understood the one about the harmonica though.

    @Soubriquet - Cassius Marcellus Clay. I would have kept it. The rest of your comment is pure poetry, you know. Much better than my post. Thanks. :)


You must be at least minimally sober to comment!